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Those who have been comfortably living under a rock for the past few decades will be amazed, but here’s a tidbit of trivia: School is generally boring.

Even if you’ve managed to snare a fleeting mote of interest in one subject or another, or perhaps a particular class and teacher, it remains a fact of life that nobody can be amusing forever. At some point, you will be bored in class. So what to do?

Good question. What I can most reliably tell you is not to dive out your classroom window (which has been done), but all the same, here’s one to try:

1. You need two people. Preferably they are seated next to each other, but as long as they can communicate without shouting, they’ll be fine. Stare into each other’s eyes. Stare hard, mind you. Strike fear.
2. The arbitrarily-chosen first player begins by saying a word. Any word will do. “Frankfurter” is a nice opening word, but I’ve heard better.
3. Once you’ve done this thing, your eager opponent may take his turn. By doing what? Why, the same as you. He speaks a word. “Tetrapylectomy” will do.
4. Rinse and repeat.

The joy of this game comes from the one and only rule: your word may not, either directly or by obvious association, be related to any previous word. So if you say “Thermopylae,” neither of you should be saying “Sparta” any time soon.

This is a bit of a loose rule, and subject to a great deal of interpretation. If the associated word is quite recent and very obvious, you lose horribly, and your opponent receives your forfeit, which should properly consist of either a demeaning act or your attractive sister. However, if the previous word is some ways back, you can probably slip it by. And if the association is so thin as to be unnoticeable — “progressive” and “Congress,” for instance — then you’re in the clear.

Beyond that there are no rules. “Fish-eating purple conducive malaria” could be used as a word. If you get ideas from objects around the room, try to be discreet about it; saying “Joe” when your opponent’s name is “Joe” might be construed as unsporting.

This beguiling game was created by two souls in my Spanish class who shall remain nameless, until and unless they piss me off.

This site, as you can probably tell, is updating again, its owners having enjoyed a restful vacation. With it comes a new toy: a community poll, located in the right-hand column of the main page (this one). Look to your right; it should be just below the gray sub-navigation box.

The point of this poll is to gather feedback from readers about various issues, and it will sometimes be humorous, sometimes wholly in earnest. At the moment, the poll is just something somewhat random to make sure it works. A new one will be up in a while, and every week or so thereafter.

Operation is simple: just click your choice and click “Vote.” Once you do, you willl be shown the results, and not allowed to vote again. If by some chance you are allowed to vote again . . . don’t.

Report any problems to us.

Finals (that cursed beast) are nearly upon us. Next week is the so-called “dead week,” when theoretical teachers don’t assign any theoretical new material, theoretical coaches don’t schedule any theoretical games, and theoretically no new material is learned — it’s all review for the upcoming finals.

In the real world, people do whatever they like during dead week, because it’s not officially observed.

In any case, the week after next is finals itself, which will observe the following schedule:

MONDAY: No school. Martin Luther King day.

TUESDAY: Regular day.

WEDNESDAY: Period 1 Final 8:30–10:35; Period 2 Final 10:45–12:50

THURSDAY: Period 1 Final 8:30–10:35; Period 2 Final 10:45–12:50

FRIDAY: Period 1 Final 8:30–10:35; Period 2 Final 10:45–12:50

Basically, it’s the same schedule for all three days, so don’t worry about it. Finals for periods 0 and 7 will be “at the teacher’s discretion,” which means “do what they tell you to do.”

“All there is to thinking,” he said, “is seeing something noticable which makes you see something you weren’t noticing which makes you see something that isn’t even visible.”

—Norman Maclean, A River Runs Through It

Given that, it’s not much surprise that I’m light on news today. I’ve been utterly out of it for two weeks and spent the last two days in a sleepwalking daze; in such a state, very little is “noticable,” making the rest somewhat difficult.

— Brandon